6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
I bet the guy on the treadmill next to me with the noise-canceling headphones wishes he could trade them for smell-canceling noseplugs. Hard to believe that last one did not involve any pants-shitting on my part.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
Randomize
