through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
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