i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
I look excited, but its just a facade.
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
