you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
Bring me that man meat
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
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