am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Randomize
