I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
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