just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
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