I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
