their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
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