But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize