she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
Randomize
