i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
the liver wants what the liver wants
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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