People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
Randomize
