whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Randomize
