I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
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