last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
Randomize
