So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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