fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
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