he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
Congratulations! We have a period
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