I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
I need water and some morals
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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