You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize
