At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
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