I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
Randomize
