morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
See, the Lortab wasn't working enough, so I thought "hey, vodka can speed that up! That's how science works!" Which probably should've been my indication that the Lortab was in fact working
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Randomize
