Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
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