How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
Randomize