small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Randomize