Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
Sober January is a disaster.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
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