everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
