I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize
