Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
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