I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
