giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
