his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
Randomize
