we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
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