Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
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