weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
Randomize