Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
