Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
Randomize
