is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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