So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
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