They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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