and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
someone owes me an orgasm
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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