i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
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