does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
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