I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
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