yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
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