oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
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