I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
Randomize
