I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
Semen is not good for contacts.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
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