I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
Oh god it's open bar.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Randomize